I Can See!
So for the first time in 8 years, I decided to get some new glasses. And before you ask, yes, my vision is that unimportant to me.
It's actually quite incredible. You never really realize just how much you couldn't see until you get glasses that work. It's ridiculous. I can see EVERYTHING. I feel like a fucking superhero. Like I can see through time.
Though, I have to admit that when I first put them on and looked in the mirror, I was a little frightened. I guess 8 years of being clinically blind really helped to cement the thought that I had pretty clear skin. When I saw myself again for the first time in so long, I could actually see inside my own face! Huge pores people. Huge. Gross. Let's not talk about it.
Another weird thing is that I can see so clearly now, that if I look in the mirror through my glasses into my eyes on the other side of the mirror through that other set of glasses, I'm pretty sure I can see into my own soul. It's a weird place. It's dark. And it smells like a sock.
Also, before I got these new bad boys, I was convinced that there were only two dimensions. Now it feels like I'm walking around with 3D glasses on (but I obviously don't look as cool as Biff's minion in the first Back to the Future movie).
Is this what you people see like all the time!? Why didn't anyone tell me? You guys are jerks. But lovable jerks.
- The Bean
2 years ago
2 comments:
christ,
you were scaring me, I thought you were going to say you thought you were white in the mirror till you got your new glasses next.
Willie nillie
I may be a jerk, but you, sir, are hard of seeing, so I will simply steal your new fancy glasses, and hold them ever-so tauntingly inches above your head, thus proving us both right.
Just so we're clear, the next time you see me, I'm the big handsome guy with the beard. Since you haven't had new glasses in 8 years, and I have met and grown to know you in the last 8 years, you may not know exactly how I look.
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